lolotehe: Quote (Quote)
2017-07-08 12:15 pm

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lolotehe: video (Video)
2017-06-20 02:34 am

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This is the kind of stuff I listen to when performing unpleasant but necessary tasks, in case you've ever wondered.
lolotehe: Quote (Quote)
2017-06-18 08:52 am

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lolotehe: Quote (Quote)
2017-06-16 11:07 am

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Working a helpdesk involves two essential skills: trouble shooting and customer service. We need to solve problems, but also make our callers feel good about reaching out to us. If you fix the issue but the caller has a terrible experience during the call, guess which part they’ll remember (and complain about later)?

With that in mind, there are several things we really don’t want to say on the phone when someone calls us asking for help.

It causes me physical pain that I had to write this. )
lolotehe: Quote (Quote)
2017-06-12 02:11 pm

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Defense counsel was giving his summation in a case involving a client who had been charged with murdering his wife, even though her body had never been found. He tried to the best of his ability to sow the minds of the jurors with the seeds of reasonable doubt, dramatically proclaiming that nobody could demonstrate that the alleged victim was even dead. Every eye in the courtroom gazed in the direction indicated by his outstretched arm as he pointed to the doors at the back of the courtroom and thundered, “Why, she might walk through those doors any second now!”

It was a masterful technique. When the jurors realized that they themselves had been expecting the supposedly dead woman to burst through the courtroom doors just then, how could they possibly maintain they were sure beyond a reasonable doubt that the defendant had killed her?

The prosecutor was undaunted. Slowly rising from his seat behind the table, he too gestured towards the courtroom doors. But his voice was calm as he looked the jurors in the eye and began to speak: “Every head in this courtroom turned toward that door just now — every head except one, that of the defendant. He didn’t bother to look because he knows she’s not going to walk through that door. He killed her.”

--Snopes
lolotehe: Events (Events)
2017-06-02 11:32 am

Events

I've been lax in posting cross-stitch, so there's lots of pictures here:

Putting under a cut, 'cause pictures are big. )
lolotehe: (Just....christ)
2017-04-10 02:39 am

Events

So! Friday night, very shortly after having a conversation with my co-worker about bomb-shelters, the sirens went off in Dallas



ALL OF THEM.

Wait a minute...



I fuckin' knew it.
lolotehe: (Just....christ)
2017-04-08 12:42 am

Events

Chatting with my Ukrainian-born co-worker at shift change. “At least we aren’t bombing anyone tonight,” is a joke now. “See you in twelve hours, if there are twelve hours left,” is another.

He told me the first American movie he saw after the wall fell was The Day After. That didn’t make sense at first, but later it did. We would have beaten them, it says.

Then we talked about bomb drills and basements and how the air was never right down there and I mentioned how the operations staff in the British nuclear war film Threads all suffocated in their shelter. I’m not sure why, but this made us laugh uncontrollably for a few minutes. “But it’s very sad,” he said.

They always had drills and films about how to protect yourself in a shelter. I said we had the same, but in Texas, we had tornado drills and he told me how he’d never seen anything like a tornado before he came here. “We don’t have that. Nothing like that.”

Which actually got us talking about the Russian Wizard of OZ books, there are 12 OZ books, but only 10 or so of the Russian version. “He just translated them and changed the names,” he tells me.

I told him about the Waffle House index and he asked if they had fried chicken. No, they do not. And they are not in every state. Just the ones with tornadoes and hurricanes.

“What do they have in the other states?” he asked.

“Blizzards and liquor stores.”

“Ah,” he said. “Just like in Ukraine.”

Then, at 11 PM tonight, the sirens went off. Reports came in they were going off all over Dallas. Nice clear night.

Called into work to let the coworker know what was up.

"You will need a pillow over your head," he said.

"OK," I said. "See you in nine hours."

"EIGHT AND HALF HOURS," he said. "Go sleep."

Meanwhile, neighbors on nextdoor.com are making jokes about WOLVERINES and triffids.
lolotehe: Events (Events)
2017-04-05 01:35 am

Events

More news on the crazy-ass church situation.

When the council-member gave us their cell phone number and promised to come over and listen, the pastor said, “So if you come over and don’t hear anything this is all over, right?”

Oh, buddy, no it is NOT. Here's what I told her.

Simple advice )
lolotehe: Events (Events)
2017-03-26 08:40 pm
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Events

I was talking with some folks a while back about how I have to get the bathroom in my house redone. There’s no actual tile in the bath, just some kind of plastic molded shit, and it’s starting to bow out in the tub. I’m only slightly terrified of what kind of rotten mess is behind that.

But, as a joke, what I want to do when I DO get the wall redone is seal in a fake baby skeleton in a christening gown.

I’ve done some pricing on this and a half-way decent looking fake baby skeleton costs roughly $600, but only $300 if it has two heads. This led to a debate on if I should put one tiny gold cross necklace on it or two and that led to a debate on where the soul resides and how many souls a two-headed baby would have.

After a while, I also decided that when I finally get the kitchen redone (similar tile situation there, but sans bowing), I should entomb a really nice bottle of wine with a note, “I’m sorry about the baby.”

What makes this really funny is, if you watch those house remodeling shows, they always do the kitchen first.

Now, add to all this, I recently inherited an old trunk. I had long ago joked about putting a trunk in the corner of my attic containing a skeleton in a wedding dress. Hell, there’s Christmas carols about shit like that.

I’d also like to point out I’m the second owner of my house. My house was built in 1930 and the previous owner was a very tall woman who I suspect died in the house.

Another thing about my house is the chimney was capped god knows when and the fireplace converted to gas. Someday, I’d like to turn it back into a proper wood-burning fireplace.

And then, the other day, while looking for something else, I stumbled on this Wikipedia article about dried cat. Not what I expected to find, but kinda interesting on its own.

So. That’s the setup. Yesterday at work, starting thinking about a story. Might make a fun little 30-minute film.

Go on. )
lolotehe: Events (Events)
2017-03-12 04:02 am
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Events

tumblr_omp1d6KlIf1r2fq6oo1_1280

I made a couple of minor changes when it came to the back-stitch. Namely, those weird yellow things are outlined in a dark brown instead of darkest brown and the white shells are outlined in that same brown instead of darkest blue.

I’m still iffy about this pattern. Granted, I got it for free with some fabric, but the colors are very 80s. That one pink starfish is a little distracting and the sand-dollars are odd. It’s not a bad pattern, but it could use quite a few tweaks.

This was a good experiment in a wreath pattern. Everything I’ve done up to this point has a center I can work from. Due to the fabric used, drawing a grid didn’t work that well, except for starting it.

All that said, there was one shell I really liked.

tumblr_inline_omp1b5eUjy1r04xxr_540

I dunno why I like it as much as I do. I changed the colors here to use a more brown yellow than the bright yellow the pattern asked for. I guess I just like the texture.
lolotehe: video (Video)
2017-03-01 12:16 am
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framed-rough

OK, so the floating frame idea is sound, but I need to tweak it a bit. More fray on the piece and a smaller caption. I want it to look like an artifact in a museum with a typed description.

Also, super reflective glass lets you see 1/2 of my library. Good times.
lolotehe: video (Video)
2017-01-30 10:02 pm
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lolotehe: video (Video)
2017-01-14 12:12 am
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done

I was very worried this would look too muddy. I had to convert the pattern from Anchor to DMC and there's no exact colour-to-color match. I do think I made the wrong choice on a couple of colors, but it looks like it turned out OK for the most part. I might do it again, considering how easy it was.

This is a good beginner pattern, I think. I generally don't like complete-fill, but in this case, I won't be too picky. This was on 24-count, but would look good on 28 or even-weave. I'm thinking I'll fray the edges a bit and put it in a floating frame.
lolotehe: video (Video)
2017-01-11 12:44 am
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lolotehe: Events (Events)
2017-01-05 12:34 am
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Events

20161231

So that's done. Finished it on Saturday. It's getting some good reactions over on Tumblr.
lolotehe: video (Video)
2016-12-21 11:11 pm
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